Worry may be one of those sins that is hard to recognize. OR maybe just an addiction of sorts. Worrying for me is a sin of not trusting God. A sin of pride because I like to be the caretaker, I like being in control. I like fixing things. I remember being young and feeling — “I got this God, I can do this for you.”
Thankfully God had patience and mercy. He probably laughed a little and being God He let me find my way. He didn’t need me to do anything, He needed me to be the person I was created to be. Thankful that He put very wise people in my way. Thankfully I had His word. Thankfully I had the Church.
Maybe it took a few crosses to force me to look to God first, and for me to put more and more trust in God. I had to trust God, and had to learn God is enough.
Thankful that I learn about CoDA (Codependency Anonymous). And learned the Steps.. the first 3…. 1) I can’t; 2) God can; 3) I will let Him.
Worrying and anxiety only puts the focus on myself and makes me self-centered, whether I worry about myself or worrying about how I will fix another person’s problem. It all had to do with me. Little by little I continue to learn that God had it all. He has the big plan. He already knows the outcome.
God created me and God can recreate me. God made you and only He can recreate you. It is a matter of surrendering to God. Not a painful thing at all, unless I stubbornly want my way. Surrendering is more like a hug from God. My unwillingness to let go of control caused lots of pain in my life.
The times I wanted to figure out who deserved my forgiveness or apologies. Christ died for all.. the decision about who to forgive is easy – Jesus did it on the cross, He forgave all, I only have to give each person to Him. Then I am free to be with God and I allow each person to be free with God.
My thoughts are starting to wander… so may need a part III. Always need to reflect more on God and God’s ways!
Moral of today’s story…. Don’t worry, Be happy! Jesus, I trust in You!
The Lord said to her in reply, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and worried about many things. There is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part and it will not be taken from her.