Survival – to Surrender

Watching the flooding in Louisiana has me thinking about survival.  I never learned to swim and the floods are scary to me.  I never thought that maybe I should keep a life jacket in my car when traveling to the area.  The week I was there a truck went over the railing of the Causeway Bridge.  Then the pictures last week were of the interstate being closed because of water.  I would have freaked out.

What makes me think I need a plan to survive?  I don’t know.  Guess growing up I felt I had to take care of me.  There were lots of kids in my family and as one of the oldest was always helping taking care of others.  I was quiet so didn’t really speak out what I wanted or needed.

I think I became a survivor in the womb.  My mom said I was a difficult pregnancy and didn’t think I would make it.  My name is Gina Rae for St Gerard and St. Raymond Nonnatus because they were patron saints of expectant moms.

As a little girl some of my survivor techniques were daydreaming and more daydreaming and talking to Jesus.

I started working at age 8, mowing the lawn and later worked in the snow-ball stand next door.

At 17 I went off to college and worked in the student study program.  Worked for all the things I needed for college.

Then in my 20’s I worked for Jesus, no pay but lots of time doing good deeds and praying.
My plan was to get to know Jesus and live out the gospel because I am meant for heaven.

I moved up north as my family calls it with $35 in my pocket and a one way ticket.  Had some rough years but started working.  I worked all the hours I could.  Live changed in the last two years, finding enough work with enough pay to survive.  But I am learning to do what God calls me to and He will help me find what I need.  Sometimes it comes in strange and mysterious ways. But I am still here and still surviving.  Maybe it is time to surrender more and focus on God’s kingdom in a bigger and better way.  Maybe I can let go of worrying about not swimming or not making it.  Maybe it is time to just let Go –  I know I always believed I have been trusting God but always had that little holding on to how I have to handle things so that I survive.

As I watch my mom transition from this world to the next I learned much about surrender. To know God is present to whatever I need to go through.  She accomplished what she felt she had to accomplish and she was ready to rest and be with God.  No more worry.

Praying God will teach me not to be so uptight as I strive to survive but let God and Let God as I can turn everything over to Him.  Without fear without worry without anxiety… just handing it over a piece at a time.

Matthew 6: 25-34
Dependence on God.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat [or drink], or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they?  Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span?  Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wild flowers grow. They do not work or spin.  But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them.   If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith?  So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear?’  All these things the pagans seek. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom [of God] and his righteousness,  and all these things will be given you besides.  Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself. Sufficient for a day is its own evil.

Really didn’t know where I was going with this… just thought I should get some of my thoughts down and I can reflect on it further at a later time.


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